heart rant

We've been through a lot together, my heart and I

Through thick and thin we've toughed it out

my heart guiding me through blizzards

And escorting me down every fork.

Blindly I followed

Filled with the simple logic that my heart knows best.

We share a common fate after all

What's good for it is good for me as well, right?

Well, that's what I thought.

Problem is my heart's a retard.

Born with a defect that no doctor foresaw

my heart doesn't have my best interests in mind.

For twenty four years

I let this appendage advise me

But like Karl Rove

my heart schemed with masochistic intent.

If those years were hours

my heart's got a single day life span.

Into the cage

Six feet underground

Locked in a lead box

With no key to be found

my heart stays.

From this day forth

I no longer follow my deceiving and malicious

heart

As my feet take the reigns

Life seems much simpler.

My feet and I share a common interest

And they've always been so supportive

They're familiar with this earth

And they keep my best interests in mind, right?

You live and you learn.

note to self

you are drunk

you are happy

everything you say is wonderful

everything you do is fun

everything you think is worthy of speech

so much energy

so much happiness

be free

be yourself

let go

let loose

Get Over It

where are the drugs?

I just saw you

like not even 2 hours ago

you'd think I would have gotten my fill

I'd think that at least, but apparently not.

Images, thoughts, feelings

coarse through my veins

en route to my heart

only to be energize and returned.

In my sleep you return again

in the most outrageous circumstances

that can't be a good thing.

I awake and there you are

lying next to me.

No, wait.

Now I'm awake and you're nowhere to be seen -

only felt.

I'm starting to worry

I need to get my mind on something else.

Drugs, drugs

where are the drugs?!

hurricane plamena

I close my eyes.

Suddenly

my stomach churns

my heart jumps

my face ripens

in reaction to

a thought.

Chemicals in my brain

burst forth

the levee broken, my mind is flooded

more, more! I cry.

I lose control

overcome with

feelings.

The thoughts cease

drowned by emotion

and I react.

My eyes snap open

blinded by chemicals I see only

you

your brain showering you in a similar manner.

Like machines we embrace

powered by drugs

two become one

nothing can stop us.

For a moment our souls

connect

briefly tasting the concoction of flavor that comprises our entire

being.

A pause.

Then the gutters fill

the sewers course

with weary chemicals

leaving barren streets behind.

The moment gone

we part

only now more curious

to taste what we missed.

And like noah I pray

for the streets of my mind to be

flooded

once again.

hearing loss

a tree falls in the woods

nobody's around

but one person hears it:

me.

the tree cries out

one final song before it

dies

beeeeeeeeeeeeee.

i'll never hear that tree again

whisper as it always had

its voice

silenced.

forever changed

i move on

the tree is gone

and soon forgotten.

gravity

Gravity pulls my

*

Every direction is

down.

WHAT THE F$*%?!

MAKE UP YOUR F*#$IN MIND!!

two

Your gaze penetrates my

being

splitting it in two:

emotion

reason.